Do you and your partner find yourselves fighting more often or just not getting along? Regardless of how bad things get, it can be difficult to know when or if you should end a relationship. Here are five signs it is time to move on and start fresh.
Lack of Respect
Love alone cannot guarantee a successful relationship. Respect plays an important role because it shows that each person values the others feelings and opinions. Finding it difficult to be polite to each other while going about your daily routine or consistently belittling what your partner says and does are signs your relationship has hit a wall.
No Time For Each Other
Few partnerships can survive without a time commitment. A relationship will flourish if both partners enjoy the emotional and spiritual connection that comes from sharing activities. Spending the majority of your free time isolated or doing something which does not include your partner can be an indication you've lost interest in the relationship.
Incompatible Goals
Incompatible goals can be as substantial as one partner wanting children and the other not wanting any or as minor as when to purchase a new vehicle. In some cases, having mismatched goals is an indication that you need to communicate more effectively and be more open with your partner. In other situations, incompatible goals are a sign of problems which cannot be resolved. The important factor is whether you and your partner are able to discuss and compromise on most issues.
Boredom
Have you found that lately you have little to say to each other or are tired of your daily routine? At some point all relationships reach a stagnant stage. This occurs partly because developing a routine with someone you care for provides a sense of comfort and security. If the routine continues indefinitely and couples don't make an effort to bring variety into their relationship, boredom will set in.
Bickering and Fighting
Frequent arguing doesn't always mean your relationship has hit a dead end. Arguing can strengthen a relationship if differences are resolved or a compromise is reached. Constant petty bickering is an indication of a more serious problem and a habit couples fall into to avoid confronting larger, more painful issues. Angry and abusive fights can serve as a warning that thoughtfulness and respect no longer exist in your relationship.
Living In the Past
Continuing a relationship because you've invested a significant amount of time into it or because your partner knows you better than anyone else are not reasons to justify staying. When your desire to stay has more to do with your history as a couple rather than the current state of your partnership, chances are your relationship has hit a dead end.
For more information on relationships and infidelity, read Rebuilding a Relationship After an Affair and What Is an Emotional Affair?
Sources:
- Rhonda Findling, Don't Call that Man!: A Survival Guide to Letting Go, Hyperion, June 2009.
- Dr. Bethan Marshall, Deal Breakers, Gallery, April 2007.
- Greg Behrendt, It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken, Three Rivers Press, September 2005.
- Mira Kirshenbaum, Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay: A Step-By-Step Guide to Help You Decide Whether to Stay in or Get Out of a Relationship, Penguin Publishing, July 1997.
- Daphne Rose Kingma, Coming Apart: Why Relationships End and How to Live Through the Ending of Yours, Conari Press, August 1987.
Danielle McGinnis - Danielle McGinnis is the mother of a college freshman and full-time freelance writer.
